WATCH Y*UR LANGUAGE
A friend is telling me about her son’s food issues.
Or rather, she’s telling me that her son is staying the week with his grandma, who doesn’t understand his food sensitivities—and Grandma is rather soul-deep offended by this youngster who sits at her table and refuses to eat the food she’s lovingly prepared for him. Grandma is my friend’s mom … my friend’s son has borderline phobias about food currently and … in sharing with me this crisis unfolding, my friend realizes her son may need to talk with someone about his food sensitivities, this may be part of his young journey that needs special guidance.
Mother/daughter & now mother/grandmother + mother/child. Every element that could possibly pull on a human heart & close personal relationships capable of emotional swirls beyond count—a writer could base a novel off of that dining room table at Grandma’s.
So we’re talking about this, my friend and I, real talk. “You hope it’s a phase, ya know ,” I say, “you’re hopeful, Mom-deep heart-hopeful that his fears and feelings about food are a phase …” She says something back that shoots a dart straight to my mind. A time that my daughter, Hope ...
“So, uh, friend, I’m not trying to tell you how to raise your son, you know, I’m not trying to come at you in any way like that (she knows) but, maybe … try putting some language to what’s happening right now, give him a way to talk about … this phase he’s in … mmm, phase makes it temporary feeling, just the word … and alludes to what comes after ‘this phase’ … and maybe he can try saying, like, in ‘this phase’ I’m in, I feel …”
Okay. I’m that friend. Maybe I shouldn’t have offered advice, right? Only listened.
It’s just that …
LANGUAGE
My daughter, Hope, was 3.
And I was calmly wiping blood from her face, her little eyelashes soaked, trying to find, there was so much blood, where, she’s screaming and crying hysterically and everything is red, where exactly all the blood was coming from.
I was calm because I was in shock, I know this now looking back. The blood was coming from—she’d twirled, she’d fallen in a split nanosecond, she’d suffered a deep gash, 8 stitches, just left of center—her beautiful little forehead.
LANGUAGE
Hope’s preschool classmates openly pointed.
Grown adults were even worse.
“Ooh, my goodness!” They’d lean into her and peer directly at her wound. “Whadya do to your face, honey? That’s a nasty cut you’ve got there!”
Hope would stand there, eyes wide and looking up at people staring, pointing at her. Her little angelic face would shift, tears would well. Spill down her cheeks.
I wanted to protect her. OMG as Mama Bear I WANTED TO EAT PEOPLE. I blazed fire with my eyes and burned adults alive, believe that, and they’d stammer and OH, UMM as they backed away from staring at my daughter’s face, but the damn damage was done. My little Hopey girl, tears. I leaned down next to a toddler who pointed at Hope’s face in preschool, and I’m not going to tell you what I said to that kid. That’s between me and God, and I believe I’m forgiven because I’ve begged.
LANGUAGE
My daughter was lost, I was f*cking lost.
And then I wasn’t. I knew I needed to equip her & I knew how.
I needed to put language around what was happening to her, for her. I needed to give her words. I told Hopey, “This is your Strawberry Boo-Boo, my girl, it’s part of your story now.”
She looked into the mirror at the fresh, pink scar across her forehead. “Will I always have my Strawberry Boo-Boo?”
Just like that, we began talking about it. We put words to her injury (cute words, she was 3) and equipped her with knowing what to say, how to speak to her Truth.
LANGUAGE
People still pointed.
Adults were always the worst. But instead of wanting TO EAT THEM, I found myself in tears.
“Ooh, my goodness! Whadya do to your face, honey? That’s a nasty cut you’ve got there!”
“Yeah,” she’d say with not a hint of sadness, her Hopey eyes sparkly, “that’s my Strawberry Boo-Boo, it’s part of my story now.”
YOUR LANGUAGE
Most clients—no, all clients.
Every single client comes to me at Feel These Words in some form/shape/feeling of “I don’t know what to write” which is ultimately “I don’t know what to say” which is because of a mix of “I find it hard to put into words what exactly I do, who I really am, and (big gulp) what it is I sell.”
Add in confusion about the business sales funnel, values-based marketing, and entrepreneurial pressure to know more/do more/earn more GO GO GO—and you’ve got every element that could possibly pull on a human heart & close personal relationships capable of emotional swirls beyond count … a writer could base a novel off that all layered DIY writing nightmare.
Except, I’m not writing a novel, I’m creating a DIY course.
YOUR MF LANGUAGE
Because I know intimately that passionate entrepreneurs and business owner feel f*cking lost when it comes to writing their website—and I know my web designers who walk the creative line with me *need their people* to know how to write their website because my badass clients include referrals from dope-ass designers stuck, toe-tapping on their clients … who thought they could write their own website copy & found out they’re f*cking lost.
(It’s good. It happens all the time, don’t sweat it. Reach out.)
“How to Write a MF Website” course launches 11-15-2021. If you’re interested in learning from a slightly sweary instructor who teaches you what to say about your Strawberry Boo-Boo & how to sell during ‘this phase’ you’re in right now--LANGUAGE & BIZ STRATEGY--you’re going to want your name on The MF List 🔥
More real soon.
P.S. People are resilient, the kids are alright even when they aren’t. Over time, Hope’s forehead healed; her Strawberry Boo-Boo is today a faint scar, a small part of her now 12-year-old story. I’m hoping for similar end results for my friend’s son. XO
P.P.S. REAL TALK RIGHT NOW: If you are the reason a web designer is toe-tapping, or you’re feeling phobic about writing your own site, take the {FREE} 5-Day Website MiniBoost (right below). It’ll pull you through until I can teach you, step-by-MF-step, how to fully boost your business & write your MF website in November.